Friday, January 23, 2009


Ok so Monday, Jan 26th Phil and I get to find out what the sex of our baby is...well as long as baby corporates with us. And I there have been only a few times in my life have I been this anxious for something. We have two names for the baby, one if its a boy and one if its a girl. We have known for a while what we would like to name our boy so that was pretty easy...but we figured we would need a girl name just in case. And I have been thinking about names for...well since we found out we were going to have a baby. I mean a name is kind of a big deal, its not like naming your dog, where it can be funny or whatever. So Ive been thinking about it a lot and we finally were able to agree on a boy and a girl name! And when we agreed on the names...I felt sooo excited! Im totally weird I know. But little things like figuring out the name, makes this pregnancy more real for me. If its a boy we will name him Carter Lorin Bingham. If its a girl we will name her Candice Leann Bingham. And no the same initals weren't done on purpose. It just happened like that and I didnt noticed till I wrote them both down on paper and saw that it would be the same intials. So yeah those our the names we have agreed on.

For the past couple weeks Ive been able to feel the baby 'kick'. And let me tell ya, this baby is one active little thing. Im trying to record when baby is active cuz it will prob come in handy. And every so often baby will get a strong one it. Its the craziest and yet the most wonderful feeling in the world. I feel bad for my husband since he wont get to feel this feeling. He has been able to feel the kicks from the outside twice now, which is pretty awesome itself, but it still cant compare to just sitting there working and then feeling your baby kick and move around. Its just amazing. Anyways I hope you guys are all doing well! Hopefully come Monday, we will get to see what we can start calling our little one!

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

First one of the year

Ok so I am totally lame, I know. Its almost the end of January and this is my first post. The past few months have been crazy, stressful and busy. And through it all I have gained so much understand and love for those who are in my life. We are getting ready to find out what the sex of our bundle of bouncing joy will be, and Phil and I are really excited. We both kinda feel it will be a boy, but who truly knows! I just want a healthy baby. I see pros to having a boy or a girl. Either way, I know that Phil and I are going to love it with all of our hearts. Everyone around us is having their own little ones, and it amazes me how much love and joy a baby can bring into your life. My sister Kayla LOVES babies. It is one of the cutest things I've ever seen. How she tries to help out in taking care of a baby, even if she has only been around that baby for 5 mins, she is in love. As everyday passes by I get more and more excited to be able to hold my baby in my arms. Hopefully I will be better and keeping up with this blog esp with the baby growing and the time getting closer for its enterance into this world. And I know for sure that a new one will be put with what the sex is so look for that one!

Friday, December 12, 2008

Long Over Due

Ok I have totally slacked when it comes to updating this blog. Its been crazy stressful lately. But I am sooo glad its Christmas time! YAY!! I've thought back to past Christmas' and I've noticed a good change. The older I have become the more less Santa Christmas I've become (I hope that makes sense) I think I am more excited to see Kayla open her presents than I am to receive any. I love this time of year because ppl as a whole are nicer, full of love and cheer. Its always great to be around family and to celebrate the life of our Lord. To be able to sing Christmas songs at church, in the car, in my office :), and to be able to have some many opportunites to serve others. I wish Christmas was longer than a month. I know that we should try and strive to have the true spirit of Christmas with us all year round, cuz it very literally is the spirit of Christ. And I think I just came up with my new years resolution :). I cant believe how fast this year has gone by. With all the good and the bad that has happened, it truly has gone by fast. I just entered into my second trimester, which is a very good thing, I have been feeling a lot better the past two days so lets hope and pray it stays that way. Although it does scare me at the same time, the first trimester went by so fast that I know the next two will also, and then I have to give birth. I may be weird but thats the scarest part of the whole thing for me. I am literally terrified of it. But I will have to put off my fears till the day I have to face them. Anyways I am starting to ramble. I hope all of you are enjoying this season to love each other, to forgive and forget, to remember our Saviors life, and to embrace His teachings.

Friday, November 14, 2008

I recieved this email and it really touched me. I admit that when I hear about attacks on the Church, ppl protesting at our Temples it makes me mad and defensive. But this email made me realize that thats not the Lords way. And I just wanted to post it for everyone to read. It is sad, but the message of the gospel is true and will always be true. I am so grateful for the Lord and for His love and example of how to get through this tough times.

The controversy in California regarding Proposition 8 (the proposed amendment to the California constitution defining marriage to be strictly between a man and a woman) built to a frenzy in the days leading up to Tuesday's election and then exploded into anger and violence in the aftermath of Prop 8's slim passage into law.I am a Los Angeles Police Department detective supervisor running a sex crimes unit covering the western quarter of the city, which also includes the area where the Los Angeles temple is located. I have a fantastic crew of 20 detectives who are an amazing mixture of races and sexes. I have several detectives who are openly gay or lesbian. This orientation has nothing to do with their efficiency as investigators. I deeply respect and like these individuals. I enjoy working with them. My life is often in their hands when we serve high risk search or arrest warrants. I trust them implicitly.Obviously, the types of crimes we investigate bring us into regular contact with victims who are of an alternative lifestyle orientation. It is incumbent upon us that our compassion for these victims be no less than for victims who are heterosexual.Hard ChoicesWorking in such an environment, I found taking a position on Proposition 8 to be difficult. Even though I chose to follow the direction of our Church leaders in my voting decision, it was extremely hard for me to place myself on the line when it came to actively working to ensure the passage of Proposition 8.Still, I watched in amazement as my fellow ward and stake members worked tirelessly, committing themselves full-heartedly to the cause – not out of homophobic hatred, but out of a love of Christ and a belief in the sanctity of traditional marriage. Their faith strengthened mine, and I committed to participate in a sign waving public rally sponsored by our stake to be held at a local intersection.By following through on this commitment, I found I had a greater stake in the battle than I had ever thought. I learned a number of hard and harsh lessons. And in the events following the election and passage of Proposition 8, I felt great anguish forcing me to drop to my knees in prayer – eventually coming to a more personal understanding of the Love of Christ and what he expects from me.During the Proposition 8 rally, as I stood with my wife and friends waving Yes On 8 signs and waving to the passing rush hour traffic, I learned several things. I learned supporters of both Yes On 8 and No On 8 liked to honk their horns. I learned the way to tell the difference is the No On 8 supporters usually accompanied their horn honking with an obscene gesture or a string of obscenities. They also liked to swerve their cars toward the children on the curb.I learned when we didn't engage in argument with the No On 8 supporters who intermingled with us in the intersection, they became enraged, red faced, and fit to burst.I have no doubt Yes On 8 supporters both from our church and other churches engaged at some point in the shouting matches during the numerous rallies and demonstrations across the state. However, on the evening of my participation, I was amazed by the cool and non-confrontational way the Yes On 8 supporters conducted themselves.I learned at the rally several of our ward members had received hate mail after their names, religious affiliation, contribution mounts, and addresses were published on a website inciting No On 8 supporters to target the listed individuals. Their houses and cars had been vandalized, their campaign support signs stolen, and opposition signs planted in their place.When I returned home after the rally, I had a huge headache and my stomach was in knots. I am not a fan of confrontation, and the noise of the horn honking, both pro and con, and the divisive atmosphere inherent in the volatile situation had taken its toll. Still, after praying with my wife, I felt calmer and was pleased we had chosen to participate. While our efforts were miniscule compared to the hours of service to the cause provided by others, we had at least jumped down from the fence and done something.Then I saw the latest No On 8 television commercial.Tolerance?Supposedly produced by an independent group not affiliated with the official No On 8 campaign, the thirty second commercial spot shows two scruffy male white actors portraying Mormon missionaries who force their way into the well-kept home of a married lesbian couple.“Hi, we're from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints,” one says.“We're here to take away your rights,” says his companion.The missionaries then rip the wedding rings from the women's fingers and ransack the house until they find the women's marriage license, which they destroy.“Hey, we have rights,” one of the women says.“Not if we can help it,” answers a missionary.Moving outside the residence, one of the missionaries smugly says, “That was easy.”Flexing his muscles, his companion asks, “What do we want to ban next?”While I was appalled by the commercial, I was even more appalled both MSNBC and The Comedy Channel happily took money to broadcast this overtly hate filled vignette. I cannot imagine a similar commercial, targeted at any other religious or racial group, not being considered a hate crime with a civic outcry for prosecution.My hackles were beginning to rise in a distinctly unchristian way. However, the fun was just beginning.Election Day And AftermathElection day in California saw numerous No On 8 activists distributing literature and vocalizing at polling sites in clear violation of election laws. Police were called, 100 yard distances from the polling places were paced off, yet the agitation continued.Despite these efforts, Proposition 8 obtained a slim majority (52.5% to 47.5%). Exit polls showed the proposition was supported by 7 of 10 Black voters, a majority of Latino voters, and by people with children under the age of 18 still at home. Clearly, it was supported by all people who believed marriage is a special and protected institution.The day after the election, spontaneous protests sprung up in West Hollywood – a small residential community, with a large gay and lesbian population, located within Los Angeles County , but just outside Los Angeles city borders. The protests did not have a particular focus or target other than outrage as they strayed outside the confines of West Hollywood and into Beverly Hills , Hollywood , and West Los Angeles . Several arrests were made, but the seething anger at the passage of Proposition 8 was not dampened.On Thursday, however, two days after the election, rumors began to be picked up by LAPD of a large protest organized by gay and lesbian activists and their supporters to be staged outside the Los Angeles LDS temple on Santa Monica Boulevard in West Los Angeles.LAPD has 22 geographic Areas divided between 4 administrative Bureaus . My investigative unit is attached to Operations-West Bureau – which has responsibility for the area where the Los Angeles temple grounds are located. We operate out of a squadroom across from the Bureau's administrative offices. In such proximity, I was in a position to observe the command post set up in the Bureau offices to monitor the actions of the field command post charged with keeping the already illegal (no permits) protest peaceful.What I learned by watching and listening shouldn't have surprised me, but it did. During my 30+ year tenure, the LAPD as an organization has made great professional strides in the internal battle against sexual harassment, sexual orientation harassment, and racism. While there are still those in civil liberty organizations who contest we are still guilty of racially profiling on the streets (difficult to imagine when our department is so thoroughly integrated at this point in time), organizationally there is little or no tension remaining in these areas.In the Bureau command post there was a large screen television displaying scenes from the protest outside the Los Angeles temple. Imagine my surprise, when angry protestors began rushing the closed temple gates, and I heard an officer in the command post say, “I hope they burn that place to the ground.”Imagine my even stronger surprise when another officer replied, “They better hope they don't get through the gates, because the Mormons have an army in a bunker under the temple that will come out and kill them all.”Really? My temple recommend must not be of a high enough clearance to get me into that part of the temple.I'm now doing a slow burn. Not only am I watching a sacred building under siege from 2,500 angry people shouting, “ SEPERATION OF CHURCH AND HATE,” and carrying signs proclaiming MORMON HATERS and LOVE NOT HATE, I'm listening to other police officers who agree with the protestors or have the most imaginative fantasies about blood atonement armies hidden under the temple (exactly how do we feed them, drill them, get them in and out without anybody seeing, or are they all in a state of suspended animation until needed?).I want to emphasize these were not officers or detectives from my own unit – who are all aware of my Mormon faith. Those in my unit who disagree with me over this issue are respectfully tolerant, as I am respectfully tolerant of their opposite beliefs. Tolerance, as Orson Scott Card recently pointed out, is indicative of disagreement. It is not a battle we choose to fight amongst ourselves. Most of us have known each other for a long time and are either embracing of, or oblivious to, our differences – divisiveness has no place in the types of investigations we conduct.The MobThe worst, however, was yet to come. The temple presidency made a decision to close the temple for the evening. The right decision, but since when do we as Americans stand by – no matter what our religion – while access to a place of worship is forced to close down because of aggressive outside influences?The late local news showed scenes of several Hispanic females in tears outside the temple trying to remove the signs desecrating the walls and fences surrounding the temple. As these individuals – who according to a temple spokesperson were not church members – removed the hate-filled signs, the mob exploded and began beating the individuals to the ground. Police intervened and arrests were made, but the fact this was allowed to happen at all was appalling.Other supporters of Yes On 8 drove slowly by the protestors with Yes On 8 signs attached to their cars and pickups sparking other violent confrontations.A friend of mine, watching the same scenes play out on the television, called and said he felt like he wanted to go down to the temple with a baseball bat and begin swinging at the demonstrators. I must admit, the natural man in me agreed.In actuality, the scenes on the television, literally drove me to my knees in prayer for the safety of the temple, the members, and our church. A lesson I have learned several times before, caused me to expand my prayers to include those who were opposing us for they are not our enemies – they are our brothers and sisters in Christ.The Appropriate ResponseIn the face of hatred, how are we to feel about this focused attack upon our church? An attack launched not because we are the only supporters of Proposition 8, but because we have been the most visible and financially supportive entity in the battle. We are an easy target.In a recent article on Christian Courage , Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles wrote, “I would say that one of mortality's great tests comes when our beliefs are questioned or criticized. In such moments, we may want to respond aggressively – to put up our dukes . But these are important opportunities to step back, pray, and follow the Savior's example. Remember, Jesus Himself was despised and rejected by the world. And in Lehi's dream, those coming to the Savior also endured ‘mocking and pointing … fingers' (1 Nephi 8:27). ‘The world hath hated [my disciples],' Jesus said, ‘because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world' (John 17:14). But when we respond to our accusers as the Savior did, we not only become more Christlike, we invite others to feel His love and follow Him as well.“To respond in a Christlike way cannot be scripted or based on a formula. The Savior responded differently in every situation. When He was confronted by wicked King Herod, He remained silent. When He stood before Pilate, He bore a simple and powerful testimony of His divinity and purpose. Facing the moneychangers who were defiling the temple, He exercised His divine responsibility to preserve and protect that which was sacred. Lifted up upon a cross, He uttered the incomparable Christian response: ‘Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do' (Luke 23:34).”We have often been instructed to love our enemies, and despite the current horror of our trials, this is no time to do differently.As I write this (Friday, November 7, 2008), plans are being made by the LAPD to respond to another larger protest/demonstration being planned by No On 8 supporters to be staged in front of the Los Angeles temple on Saturday.This is interesting since Saturday is my stake's day in the temple. For some weeks now, we have been encouraging families to come together to the temple on Saturday to participate in ordinances.How do we respond to hatred disguised by the adversary as tolerance? Our stake president has talked to the temple presidency who has assured him the temple will be open for business as usual. There are eight weddings scheduled on the grounds. Will we be able to get to the temple without being molested or our vehicles vandalized? We must place our faith in the Lord and proceed.Challenges to our faith are not new. Nor are they likely to go away anytime soon. But, as Elder Hales reminds us, “True disciples of Christ see opportunity in the midst of opposition. We can take advantage of such opportunities in many ways: a kind letter to the editor, a conversation with a friend, a comment on a blog, or a reassuring word to one who has made a disparaging comment. We can answer with love those who have been influenced by misinformation and prejudice – who are ‘kept from the truth because they know not where to find it' (D&C 123:12). I assure you that to answer our accusers in this way is never weakness. It is Christian courage in action.”Lessons LearnedClearly there are lessons to be learned from the current unrest:Tolerance is not agreement and should not be a one way street. However, we must still remain tolerant of those who are intolerant of us.Recognize the adversary at work here – making good seem bad and evil seem good.We can only be disciples of Christ when we respond to adversity in a Christlike manner. To do less opens our actions to the influence of the adversary and hurts us even more.We should never take for granted the opportunities we have to gather together in worship. We should never put off the opportunity to attend the temple. For these valuable things can be disrupted and possibly even closed to us – if not permanently, then at least on a temporary basis.Pray. Often. Don't forget to include those who are set against you.And finally, have no doubt President Monson knows where all of this is leading. He will surely reveal the knowledge to us on the Lord's timetable. Meanwhile, we must support and trust him, his inspired councilors, and our inspired local leaders in our actions. Their actions of Christian courage will be our examples

Monday, November 10, 2008

Good News!

OK so some of you know, some of you might not yet know, but I might as well say it now, But I am Pregnant! Crazy I know. I am about 9 weeks along, Im due June 12th, 2009. It was a surprise, cuz we didnt expect to get pregnant so soon, but we are excited. And I know that I totally sound like a wimp, and honestly maybe I am. I really dont like how Im sick all the time. Ive been taking Phenagern (or however you spell it) and its made me beyond sleepy. So I dont like taking it all day. It always seems to happen that saturday night is really bad, and it carries over into sunday. And by the time Monday comes, I've missed yet another weekend to feeling sick! And today isnt any better, I hope that once I hit my 3 month mark it will decrease. But its kinda hard to feel excited all the time when I dont know if I am going to be able to keep down the food I just ate. And it sucks cuz everyone I know around me, says that they rarely felt what did I do? Again dont get me wrong I am excited for the little one, but I could def do without the sickness stopping me from living life....

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

A Rather Crazy Day

Ok so there has been a lot of things that have happened today. One, well as almost everyone knows by now Obama is our new Pres. How do I feel? The first thoughts to my mind when i heard the news, now is the time to make sure Im living the way Im suppose to so that I can be protected from the evil in our country. No joke. But I do hope that with Faith, we can be safe and this country will remain a chosen place. Second, the Prop 8 passed...(at least i think thats how it goes) but needless to say, gay marriage is banned in Calf. Which I felt relief over that news. I am not going to sit here and bash those who do not have the same views as I do. I have some really close friends who arent straight. But I believe that just because we dont see eye to eye, we must still give respect and our love to those who dont agree with us. Hate the sin not the sinner. Its what Christ wants from us. And now is the time to stand up and share His love. Third thing, I woke up to snow! And as pretty as it is, I dont really care for it. Its too cold for me. I know I know, I live in Utah! But I guess I am never ready for the winter season to come around. I hope everyone is safe and is having a good day!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008


Well I for one cant believe it is already November. October went by as a blur for me. There is a lot going on this month, My sister will be turning 21! Which only makes me feel older. And of course there is Thanksgiving. I love the holiday season bc it brings family together, even when there are differences, to celebrate what we are truely thankful for. For starters, I want to say what Im thankful for.
1. The Gospel, without it, I would be completely lost.
2. The Savior, for His love and sacrifice so that I may be able to return home again.
3. My Husband, He is my strength and my best friend, I dont know what I would do without him.
4. My family, for their love and support throughout my life.
5. Our friends, for without them, we wouldnt have boring sunday nights ;)

Thats just a beginning list, so through out the month (hopefully) I will cont to add more to my Thankful list.